Archives for posts with tag: humor

Not Letting Go

March 19, 2023 //

Hold me!

Ahem, so, it’s been a minute since anyone posted here, on the Nudge Wink Report, and I refuse to let that stand. I have fresh(ish) art to inflict upon the masses, and a number of dad jokes to torment you with. Let’s start there.

If you have a helpful ant, is it your assist ant?

Have I told you my bad memory joke?

There are three types of people in this world. Those who can count, and those who can’t.

Bad spellers of the world, untie!

My wife is leaving me because I’m going bald. Oh well, hair loss.

Have I told you my bad memory joke?

Whilst I think of witty observations of recent events (recent events that somehow don’t set off an existential crisis in everyone), I will have to leave things there for now. Hopefully this can kickstart proceedings here, given them a Nudge (Wink Wink), and we can all Report in the right direction.

Tags comedy, funny, humor

Categories Humor, Meerkat Musings, Nudge, Wink

Senseless Sarcasm (what other kind is there)?

By floridaborne

August 9, 2018 //

Okay! I admit it! I haven’t written anything for NWR in…in

Dear God!

SIX MONTHS?

Where did the thyme go?

Ah, the spice of life; hair today, gone tomorrow. If you don’t believe it, you haven’t seen what’s left on my head.

Over-dramatic representation

What’s new in the news world?

Not much.

Same old stories about rape gangs in Europe, civil war in Africa, famine, garbage islands the size of Australia in the Pacific, radioactive tuna, people of all races/colors/creeds fighting over wrongs that happened centuries ago while human trafficking happens right in front of them.

In other words, we never learn a D@%&#d thing.

Hmm…what do I want for breakfast?

That has to wait until I feed the cats, or they’ll be trying to steal my turkey ham and eggs.

Hey…something interesting on social media. Poor woman!

I know, I know, what’s wrong with ~~me, us,~~ the world? I actually found the non-medical term for it:

Yes, we are suffering from a bad case of OCD:

Other Countries Deficits

….and ADD

Any Distraction (will do) Disorder.

One day, I’ll donate the 20 blankets I don’t use to charity. One day, I’ll go through my fridge and find the remains of that apricot cobbler I couldn’t finish. Someday I’ll give $10 a month to help fight female genital mutilation…

Oh, look! I don’t have to be concerned about 3rd world problems any longer!