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nowAnd now, for something completely different:

Who can take a sentence
(who can take a sentence)
And turn it all around
(and turn it all around)

Take an upside-down smile and make it into a frown
The Comma Man
(the Comma Man)

Oh, the Comma Man can
(the Comma Man can)

Hey, Comma. Thanks for the assist! Now we’re cooking with fire. I’ll take it from here. I got this.

So, yeah. It has come to my attention that it is now 2018. It has fallen on my shoulders to be the welcome wagon for little Baby New Year and/or garrote Old Man Time. But thanks to my close personal friend, the comma, that’s not what I’m gonna do.

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fork-road

Image source: Vinny Lingham

I have a few words I’d like to say about my close, personal friend, 2017. I’ll start with: “Suck it.”

It goes downhill from there.

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reporter-1“The storm is here,” said the governor. Everyone looked out their windows and said, “Hey, he’s right!”

Bulletin, bulletin, bulletin! Bulletin, bulletin, bulletin! The sun did not come up this morning, huge cracks have appeared in the earth’s surface, and big rocks are falling out of the sky. Details twenty-five minutes from now on Action Central News, kids!

–George Carlin, Take-offs and Put-ons, 1967

First Harvey, now Irma. Leave it to a woman to be forced to pick up after a man, even though an unimaginable gulf exists between them. What else is new? Read the rest of this entry »