Merry Happy Jingle Chestnuts

It’s not over yet but 2017 was the year I fully embraced the Stoli. And this will be my first Christmas without turkey. I refuse to get rid of the vodka that’s taking up shelf room in my freezer to make room for a Butterball. Watching Trump peck and scratch his way to obscurity is turkey enough for me.

The field reporters for The Nudge Wink Report did a stellar job this year, blogging about this, that, and the other thing. We managed to find the funny every week, without missing…okay, we missed a few. Like that time Dave showed up wearing…huh. Just realized I can’t tell that story. Or any of the other reasons some of us missed our deadlines this year. *nudge, wink*

Management is so impressed relieved that we keep turning up even though the coffee around here comes FROM A CAN, they’ve given us the rest of the year off to go forth and be joyful. To find the reason for the season. To jingle our bells. Or to pinch the Grinch. Whatever toasts our chestnuts.

What happens when you go drinking with she who wears sunglasses at night

Wink is here.

Wink is hungover.

Wink blames BD and wants to know what she did with his clothes.

Wink called up his good friend Chris Walken and, together, they came up with this.

If you call Chris to confirm, he’ll deny it. Like Wink paid him to.

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Don’t blame the Tibetan monk

Wink reporting for duty as requested in a rather stern email I received from Commandant Nudge last night while holding up the bar at Lucky’s. He accused me of slacking. I lied and said I was working on my post.

Now I can come clean. I had nothing. NADA. No comprendo the assignment. Then CNN came on the telly and just like that, I was golden.

Seems someone stole Ronald Reagan’s arm. I don’t know who this guy is, but someone was pissed. It looks more like it was ripped clean off.

With the economy in Europe, this amount of copper could buy something on the Riviera.