Merry Happy Jingle Chestnuts

It’s not over yet but 2017 was the year I fully embraced the Stoli. And this will be my first Christmas without turkey. I refuse to get rid of the vodka that’s taking up shelf room in my freezer to make room for a Butterball. Watching Trump peck and scratch his way to obscurity is turkey enough for me.

The field reporters for The Nudge Wink Report did a stellar job this year, blogging about this, that, and the other thing. We managed to find the funny every week, without missing…okay, we missed a few. Like that time Dave showed up wearing…huh. Just realized I can’t tell that story. Or any of the other reasons some of us missed our deadlines this year. *nudge, wink*

Management is so impressed relieved that we keep turning up even though the coffee around here comes FROM A CAN, they’ve given us the rest of the year off to go forth and be joyful. To find the reason for the season. To jingle our bells. Or to pinch the Grinch. Whatever toasts our chestnuts.

SPECIAL REPORT : Cyber Monday Blues

Over the past two months, I’ve been writing down all the things I wanted to look for from Black Friday to Cyber Monday. 

On top of writing 57,000 words for NaNoWriMo in 30 days (That book is going to need a lot of help).

Only one item was out of stock.  If you buy it, and it says the order went through, how can it be out of stock?  Maybe the employees get first pick and you get the condolence card?

I know that people have a variety of opinions about Black Friday and Blue Cyber Monday

The pragmatic among us have this to say

It’s A Wrap

Jingle jingle jingle!

Happy [fill in the blank with your holiday of choice because we can’t be bothered to referee any fights that break out because we used a holiday that’s not on the approved list of holidays] from management and staff of The Nudge Wink Report.

It’s been a year of ups and downs and round and rounds here on NWR. We lost some bloggers and gained some bloggers, lost some battles but won the war and will live to blog another year here on WordPress.

In the spirit of the season, Management decided to cut a rug…cut the mustard…fuck. CUT US ALL A BREAK and told staff to take the rest of the month off. Hopefully to spend that time with friends and family.

For those field reporters without friends or family, management has made arrangements with a cut-rate discount motel in downtown Cleveland to set aside one standard room for the duration of the holidays that staff can share. The room is free but if staff want fresh sheets and towels, they have to take turns being the Elf on the Shelf in the motel lobby.

To all of our faithful readers, we wish you a merry [fill in the blank] we wish you a merry [fill in the blank] we wish you a merry [fill in the blank] and a happy new year!