So, as many of you probably know, I’m Australian.

Which sounds awesome. And it is, most of the time.

I bet, when you think of Australia, you picture sandy beaches and a laid-back culture (which, for the most part, it is).

Well, recently we had a vote for who our new Prime Minister would be (as well as senators and the like).

Which should be important, but we Australians go through Prime Ministers like Hogwarts goes through Defence Against the Dark Arts teachers.


However, our biggest fail so far is electing three seats of a party known as “One Nation” into parliament.

There’s Pauline Hanson, who’s like a mini-female Trump. She even has red hair to match Trump’s orange skin.

She currently wants a Royal Commission investigation into whether Islam is actually a religion (so, a waste of millions of dollars to find out, yes, actually, it is), as well as a Royal Commission into whether global warming is a thing (again, another waste of money because for some reason politicians prefer to ignore scientific proof). She’s also anti-vaccination and potentially the most stupid, ignorant, bigoted and racist woman on the planet.

On top of which, on Tuesday, the 9th of August, we were meant to have our census.
I say meant to, because the Australian government, after ex-Prime Minister Tony Abbott made massive cuts to improving out internet (by $65 million … meaning our internet is shit) thought it’d be a fantastic idea to have the census all on the one night.
Instead of, you know, trying to open it up and be a little bit more flexible.

The site has been down since Tuesday night.

Of course, instead of the ABS owning up to the fact that it couldn’t handle the amount of traffic, we’re now claiming we were ‘hacked’.


So, there you have it.

Australia elected a Prime Minister that probably won’t survive his term (if he does, he’ll be the first in … I don’t know how long), as well as an abomination that made the rest of Australia want to follow Britain’s lead and trigged a #QEXIT (getting rid of the state of Queensland for embarrassing the rest of Australia), and now a failed Census that no one can complete.

Yay for Australia!